Sledding just like a kid

My favorite winter event happened. Actually it happened while I was at work, which sent me home early. (yeah me) And prevented me from coming in that Friday as well. Sooooo........with all this beautiful white on the ground, whatever shall we do???? (innocent look)

I tell the kids Thursday eve, "Mom's going sledding with you tomorrow.) Of course I knew they would remind and remind and remind me the next day. Crazy kids wait till 5 in the eve. The sun is going down. No deterent. You do realize that's our heat source, right? No deterent. Out come the red long underwear. Mom bundles up. This ain't my first rodeo......

There's a giant hill behind out house. Way, way, (way) up at the top is this tree. As we start around the corner they are just giddy....MOM"S GOING SLEDDING!!! Of course in my house this is an event. They grab thier sister from down the hallway, MOM"S GOING SLEDDING! I start up that hill and they pause, 'you're not going up to the top are you?' Of course I am. I didn't come out here to do no penny anny puny hill. We want some serious speed. (little did I know...)

I'm about 15 feet from that dumb tree when I have to pause. Lungs burning, legs burning...what in the devil was I thinking? Breathe!!!! Up the hill to the tree we went. How many of you have been sledding? We all know (those of us who are experienced of course) that you have to have a path down through the snow for good sledding speed. Couldn't get this through my kids' head for nothing. Have to teach them everything. (big grin, love doing this)

Being that I AM the heavest person of them all, I relay this lesson for the 5th time and go down that hill.....O....M.....Gosh! Whooosh! And head over tea kettle I went. Flipping through the air, legs and arms everywhere. After I get my bearings I would have killed for a camcorder cause you know that was funny stuff right there!

Dink doesn't weight anything. She gets in that path, down she goes. I'm not sure she actually hit the snow. She'd hit those little pine trees and bumps in the ground.....she looked like a pin ball machine. It was hilarious!

B-Bugs got a little bit of weight. She went down it...whoosh! And into the ditch she went. Down one side, up the other and head over tea kettle. This was hilarious! Doog Boog and I about peed ourselves! Huffing it back up the hill we went. Snow in our face, down our shirts, up our nose. This was great. (tears streaming down my face now from the memories, hooooo that was so funny!)

I think I made it three times in a row and had to take a break. By now we had that path almost 3/4 the way down the hill. When I was finally soaked through and ready to go home, I had to pause halfway and do another path. That was fun as well. One of the girls about made it into the creek. (now THAT would have been funny!) The next day they took their brother down it and he loved it. Man that was fun!! We will SO have to do that again!

I AM THE CODE GODDESS!!!!

Okay, for the past at least two months my boss has given me a batch of code he told me to hack and see if I could make it work for what we need in the next step of our development. This code was in a code language I've never used before so the first step was finding out what was commands and what those commands meant. The next step was repeating them in the code language he wanted them in.

Laymans terms: (I do this for my hubby) I had to take a letter in Greek and rewrite it in Russian.

I figured out pretty quickly that there was more code that what I had been given so I actually had to rewrite two batches of code. Yeah! More of a challenge and I loved it. Well last night I was boucing Bubs on my feet and tossing him around when the Eureka hit me like a brick in the forehead. (some of us are harderheaded than others)

I came in and of course I had left my folder at home on my computer so I had to recall stuff from memory. I got everything changed and ...... welll....... it works.

IT WORKS! IT WORKS! THE FREAKING CODE WORKS!!

I have in my code that if it works it writes: YOU DID IT!! up on my screen. YEAH FOR ME!!!

I would just like to write; I AM THE CODE GODDESS, ALL CODE SHOULD BOW TO ME!!

Now I've been told I get to rewrite it in yet another language I've never used. YEAH FOR ME!!!

Mom Got Married! Yeah Mom!!

Okay, mom Mom has been talking about this George fellow for nigh on 2 years as far as I'm concerned. She goes into surgery and is off work for 6 weeks, he takes her out every day to do something. 'Just to spend time' as my Mom would put it.

I ask her, Mom, what's up with this George fellow? Nothing, we're just friends. Yeah, right, I say. Uh-huh, I've used that one. Sooo, the fact he drives you up to IN from GA and then continues on to MI means nothing. Or how about the fact that to drop you off and pick you up at my house is out of his way? This is just a friendship? Wish there were more 'friends' like that in the world. It would be a much better place.

This George fellow. I met him once, maybe twice. Looks just like my Uncle Wayne. I only hear all good about him. This is good, since he's spending so much time with my Mom. (only friends) Till she comes up (they) this summer and she asks, "How would you feel if I got married?" I answered honestly, "If he's a good man Mom, I'm all for it. You should be happy." Then I had to add, "It's George isn't it? You haven't been completely honest with me now have you?" "No, no, no. It's nothing like that. I was just asking." Right. After 10 years. Just asking. Uh-huh. Used that before also. "Does he know you're thinking like this?" "It was just a question." Uh-huh.

The day before my anniversary I get this phone call in my office, Mom all out of breath, "I got engaged!" "I'm assuming this is to George?" "Yes." I was as estatic for her. Yeah Mom!! Set a date? They are going to think about it, can I come. Ummm...need that date.

That date was only a month later. Nothing quick here, they were only friends...uh-huh..... Now it gets real interesting. Did I mention my Mom is the type of person to be late for her own funeral? So never gets in a rush or a hurry.....well, except when she's driving. So when we get there, she has no viel, flowers, cake topper, music.......etc, etc, etc. We are talking Series of Unfortunate events all over the place.

The night before we spent looking for a laundry mat because there were no towels for showers, blankets for sleeping, have I mentioned the number of children I have? Every place was closed. On top of that, my Mom lost her tooth. Now tell me what you imagination is showing you? Nah, it wasn't the front one, it was a cap on the side. I think this was beginning to get on Mom's nerves. Me, I'd already lost my mind. She's MUCH more patience than I. Good woman. On top of this, George is just like her. Remember, I'd met him once, maybe twice. This was my introduction to him. Funny guy. Like him alot. Wish they lived closer.

This was becoming a cluster.....a mess. The next morning my Aunts (I have more of those than I do children) were coming in and George's family as well. As much of a control freak as I am, I'm not one to just grab a situation and tell people where they are going to go. But she was already an hour late for rehersal, had 3 hours before the wedding and nothing was done yet. Time to take over.

I meet George's sister Mary. LIKED MARY! She needs to live closer as well. So I shake hands, "How good are you at telling people what to do?" I put her in charge of Mom. I take Mom's cell phone and slide it in my pocket, take her list and point the two of them (they are just alike) to the preacher again. Get busy!!

Mary, I'm told, did excellent. Mom ran into people, she guided her to where she needed to be. Good job Mary! Very proud of you!!

My Aunts. Now I like my Aunts. They are very gifted in the creative fashion. Plus they have been praying for George and Mom to get married for over 2 years. Put them in charge of some things. My family and I picked up a few things. I was putting her veil together as the music was playing. Here I am putting this on my Mother's head thinking that some day I may get the honor of doing the same for my daughters, and I couldn't help it, I cried. She was so happy and so beautiful...I have never seen my Mom act like this....ever.

I walked up to George while Mom was shopping. "What's your intentions with my Mother?" "I'm gonna marry her." "Now why in the world would you want to do that?" He looks me in the eye, "Because she's the most wonder person I've ever met." "She is kinda fabulous isn't she?" I've never seen my mother act like this. She's in love.

GO MOM!

Congratulations to the two of you!

On A Darker Note

I started to write out what I spend an hour writing by hand at 1:30am. I have erased it all. I look and I'm not sure I can write what my heart poured out in tears. Do I open myself up like that? Do I want record of a bad memory?

I've been having nightmares again. I don't think from what I've found that I dream like most people do. When I dream, it's real. I'm there. I feel the heat of the sun, the roar of the crowd reviberate through my being, the sweat of my daughters hand in my own. I'm there. I have the soar muscles in the morning, the hoarse voice from yelling, sometimes bruises.

From the time I was prekindergarten I have had nightmares. Horrid ones. As I got older they got worse. Most could rival Steven King's own imagination. Know what it's like to wake up stabbing the air where in a dream an intruder came in to kill you? I do. I also no longer sleep with a knife under my pillow. The reason for that was that my kid brother and sister came into my room when they had bad dreams or there were storms. I recognized the danger. This didn't stop the dreams.

It was always me someone was after. This continued till I was about 25-27 years old. Then they quit. The past two weeks they've continued steadily. Sometimes up to 4 and 5 a night. Now it's my children. It's my husband. We aren't talking someone is sick and dies. Horrid, horrid deaths. No mother should have the pictures in their heads that I have. No mother should hear that short of scream from thier child.

Last night was the worst. I woke up in a panic attack it was so bad. My throat hurt from screaming. I couldn't get the image to go away even with my eyes open. The look in my husbands eyes .... the vision of the incident..... where is the mind eraser when you need one?

You know it's a dream....but you still go check on the child. You still pray for protection. Pray their gardian angel is stronger than the evil out there. Why does every mother's worst nightmare happen to me almost every night?

And for the record, I didn't eat anything spicy.

Fall Birthdays (How Colorful!!)

One has to be honest, Spring has always been my favorite time of the year followed very closely by summer. It has to be the swimming. With Spring there is an awakening. Red bud trees, those tiny spring green colored leaf buds, tulips blooming in my flower bed followed by iris, I love it and I want more of it.

I shouldn't say I dread fall, but everything starts to die. So I've been working on my attitude and I have some beautiful pictures of the trees around where I work. They were gorgeous last week. My favorite are the sugar maples. The red and orange leaves, now that's pretty. Since the weather's been nice, can I put in a request that we go no lower than 50 till April? Please?

Well Dink had her birthday, as she has for the past 8 years, on Halloween. The party the girls all had was quiet fun and I've found I enjoy when they have friends over. It livens up the house (could you believe I said that with as many children there are with residence here?) and makes me feel more part of thier lives. There was one little friend of Dinks that was just so precious. Big brown eyes, curly brown hair and the sweetest personality.

We did the jello worm contest where there's a gummy worm in the jello and you have to be the first to get it. They loved that. Big weenie roast (they were foot longs) and everyone had quiet a time.

Then a week later Bubs has his birthday. Everyone gets excited about that. We got him a motorized quad which he's very upset that he can't sleep with at night. It was so funny. Dad puts it in the back of the van and here's Bubs throwing a fit, so Dad just tossed him up in the back of the van as well. He sat on his quad in the back of the van (don't get excited, we were just driving around the park), every now and then we hear it whine as he bumps into the sides of the van. God love him!

We get to a part of the park and the girls had brought their roller blades. I've never done that! I put the largest pair on, WAY too big, but I made it happen. Bubs had so much fun going underneath me. Well, I've got my hands on my knees and Doog Boog is pushing me. I throw my hands up and yell, 'yeah!' (not smart) Here comes my daughter, shoves me one more time for good measure. Folks, I ain't old, but I ain't as young as I used to be. I knew it was going to happen. She knew it was going to happen. Feet go flying up in the air and BAM!! Down on my caboose I go. Right on the asphalt. Knocked the wind out of me. My first thought? 'That's gonna hurt in the morning.'

Doog Boog comes up to me, tears streaming down her face from laughing so hard, trying to ask me if I'm alright and lift Mom off the asphalt. (If you aren't laughing, you should be - we both know it was funny) Dad is trying his best to keep a straight face. Had I any breath left, I'd have laughed too. It wasn't fun trying to move later on that eve. My body locked up and said, 'I don't think so!' Surely the fact I chased the girls around on the playground didn't attribute to that at all.

Making Progress in a Forward Motion

Well, it's a known fact that women reach 30 and everything comes crashing in. Most have children so goes the free time. Most have crows feet. Sign of aging. That middle-aged spread peaks it head up and so goes the waisteline. I'm sure there's more, but I'm in a chipper mood so my thoughts are revolving around those at the moment. I have the children. Many. I have the crows feet, they don't bother me. The middle-aged spread. Bothers me.

When I got my job, (still love it) I bought new clothes. Shorts in particular. Now, I'm trying on the shorts in the size that I normally wear and they aren't buttoning real well. Yes, I was very aware of the belly that had formed and was proudly protruding but I was determined I wasn't going to get fat. I guess sitting on the couch all hunched over the lap top didn't help my anatomy any. That and the four children who so carelessly streatched it out. (can't very well hold that against them now can we?)

I bought the shorts in the size I normally wear. By gumby, I am NOT buying bigger clothes! I won't do it!!! So, I'm hear to proudly report that after changing my diet (not going on one) and exercising on a fairly regular basis, I was able to get into my smallest pair of shorts (without laying on the bed to zip them), sit down and breathe all at the same time. Clincher, it was my fat week even! Yeah for me!! I've lost 10lbs so far.

Now I ask my sweet husband last night if I looked like I've lost weight. Nope, he says, but that's not what I see anyway. So I had to ask the question. What is it you see then? (my mind was racing to try to figure this one out on its own, it failed) I see your personality when I look at you. And then he goes into what he likes about my body. (we won't mention that here, that's mine to keep and smile about)

So, today my jeans are too baggy, my tummy is much slimmer, and I am a much happier camper. Thank you for your support!

God Thinks You're Fabulous, Why Can't You?

Okay, I'm figgin' to get a bit philisophical, Dawn style on you all.

I'm listening to my christian radio coming into work today when I hear that if you were to look at yourself like God does, you'd follow it with repentance. WHAT? Look at you like God does. Hmmmm.........well, my Bible tells me that I'm His child and His creation, so the best I can do to see his view point is to look at my kids and think of how I feel. My thoughts.

You are marvelous. What a wonder! How aweinspiring! Brings tears to my eyes with love. I love to see the world thorugh thier eyes. I love to see them learn. I enjoy teaching them. I think that they are beautiful.

Now my opinion. God created this marvelous world for us. The granders. The imagination. The beauty. The fun that I have. The ...... everything. I'm supposed to look at how God looks at me and feel guilt to the point I repent. Are you kidding me? I look at how God looks at me and rejoice!

The hardest parts of my life have been the best learning and growing episodes of my life. My divorce taught me of all things and times that no matter what was going on within me, God was always there to watch over me and that He truly did love me good, bad an ugly. I do stupid stuff and you know what? He still protected me. He still answered my prayers. He was still right by my side when I called. He never left me. Look and repent. No.......Look and rejoice. Look and praise. Look and thank. Look and give God a high five.

Who are these people who truly think God is a pessimist? That He is this awful, huge being waiting with a lightening bolt to toss at you when you goof up. Who is just waiting on the edge of His massive thrown to punish you when you do wrong. What parent, friend, hero does that? Who are these sick, twisted people? And who gave them air time?

I think that when I enjoy something new in life that is thrill, that he gets a thrill also from it. I think when I go sky diving, he'll be falling through the air with me. When I visit new places, I think he enjoys hearing my comments on his creation. I don't believe God is this negative being. I believe God has a sense of humor (have you seen some of these creatures?).

Bottom line and I'll get off my soap box, my Bible said, "Be joyful always, pray continually." How am I supposed to be joyful if I'm constantly having to repent because I was created?

Elvis has left the building!!

Helsinki, Finland

Church inside a cave. The creaters actually mined the cave and built the church out of what they mined.

Rows and rows of mink. I just wanted to run through it all.

Left is Rex Rabbit, on the right is Chincilla. The rabbit feels much like cinchilla till you feel them side by side.

Many Fins get around on bikes and they all look like this. No modern day Mt. Bike for them!

Rows and rows of Fox. This was just awesome. So many different colors and it only represented less then 10% of the stock.

I kid you not, they intentionally park on the sidewalk. I just couldn't believe it.

This building has all twelved disciples on it. The four domes were build because the archetic didn't think that the roof could support the disciples alone with the one dome.

This is supposed to represent the forests in Finland. I loved it.

This was right outside the resturaunt we ate at the first night. (Try the reindeer.)

I hope you can zoom in on this one. I promised a pic of the keyboard.

My experience from the other side of the world?  AWESOME!
I do have to admit that I was a little disappointed at how
Americanized they are.  They have Pizza Huts, Mc Donald's
and even Chinese food.  What's up with that?  The styles
are stuck in our 80's but I did the whole tucking my pants
legs into my boots deal.

And boots are in.  They are so in.  There's were boots galore
over there for shopping.  I found several pairs I would have
loved to come home in, but they were like 118 Euros.  Now, to
do the math.  One Euro costs us $1.22, and changes daily.
Ummm.....not like shopping in Canada.  But I did take the
opportunity to go into one boot emporium and try on all
sorts of boots that we don't have easy access to here.
Those boots that go all the way up the thigh, I wore those.
The nurses boots, the hot pink plastic, the ones with a 5
inch sole.  Now, the ones I really wanted, I loved, fit
perfect, couldn't justify spending the money on.

The beds here are awesome.  Or at least the ones in the
hotel.  They don't use blankets like we do, they use this
feather-down quilted deal.  I'm looking at this short little
thing that doesn't fall over the sides of the single wide bed
(there were two shoved together for our 'double' bed) and
thinking, I'm supposed to keep warm with this?  And I did!
And I loved it!  So much so that we went to the main mall
(had 7 stories and makes mine look like a vanilla wafer)
and spent the Euros to buy the thing.  It was in the bag
that the airport lost.  That will be further down.

The Finnish computer.  Yes, my boss loved this one.
I actually jumped into the business center before we
left the hotel just to take a pic of the thing.  Pictures
will be posted on here but currently my camera is in DC
with my hubby.  He wasn't awared time off yet.  From
Finland to NYC to DC.  I'm sure the man is beat and
should take some well earned time off.

The keyboard.  Anyone around me knows I type faster than
I can talk.  So I'm typing this proposal up when this sybol
comes up. <  Ahh, seems that would be in the spot where our
shift button is.  I feel like I'm in piano lessons again.
Must stretch that pinky finger over a bit more for a capital
letter.  Then I'm typing away and this symbol comes up. ä 
That would be where our ' is.  So I'm trying to find the '.
Now they have three characters on the top row where the numbers
are.  So I'm searching.  To get one set you hit shift, to get
another set you have to hit ctrl + alt.  Okay, now I'm down to
typing the same speed as everyone else.  Charlie wasn't empressed.
Well, actually he just used the incident to tease me.  Gotta love Charlie.

I also have to say that Finland has the best looking people
on a whole.  Now I don't know about you, but we got alot of
ugly Americans.  People don't take care of themselves, we
tend to be slobs, walk out looking like death in the
morning.....disagree?  Never been outside my door when I
left for work have ya?  But in Finland, most people are
blond and blue-eyed.  They eat fish ALLLLLLL the time so
most of them are fit.  I think I counted 2 overweight people,
(not including myself) while I was there.  I was so surprised
that I actually caught myself gawking.  (running, fellow
food lover!!!)  People ride bikes and walk.  Literally.
And they don't have the new fangdangled bikes, they have
the older fashioned ones.  There they have one lane for
bikes, one lane for walkers, and the sidewalk for parking.
No kidding.  I took a picture.  You should have seen the
cabbies face when I was telling him how neat it was that
they park on the sidewalks when we walk on ours.  (stupid americans!)

They don't use ice.  When we ask for ice we get two cubes
about the size of your tumb.  When I asked for ice tea I
get this weird look like I've just ordered dog.  (not
strange for the chinese)  They only serve hot tea.  And
several coffee's.  Each that will remove your socks, fold
them and put them in the drawer....after smacking you
european style on both cheeks!  Mercy!  That expresso
comes in a cup like my kids tea set, has enough just for
me to spill down my shirt and is strong enough to lift my
car.  Can you be drunk on caffeine?  Cause I think I was.

I was a little concerned after the tour that in Finland,
children start school at 7 and go till 17.  No one makes
them go.  It is free to those who are willing.  And they
do leave knowing at least 3 languages.  Usually Swedish,
Finnish and American.  They used to be owned by Sweden till
Russia took over and they've only been a free country since
the early 1900's.  Here you are given the option of learning
another language.  I guess I just learned how cocky and spoiled
we are.  Eat whatever you want.  Do whatever you want.  We
are a mega country, who cares about learning to communicate
with other nations?  There it is a way of life.  I only met
one woman (who told me in perfect english) that she didn't
speak English.  She was probably old enough to be my grandmother.

It is a beautiful country.  There is alot of history in
Helsinki and there is no way I will remember it all to post
it.  I do have to say I like how the tour guide tells me
that the ocean helps to keep the land warm in the winter
and cool in the summer.  And then posts the high and lows
of the temperatures.  That was -32.  O M Word!!!  Warm?
You call that warm?  I'm laughing in my seat.  Then she
goes on to say that fishermen have to pull thier boats
out of the ocean before winter (there were several already
on land) because the ice will crush them and cause so much
damage.  (warm)  The ice gets so thick you can drive on it
and it is used as a road for many people.  (warm she tells me)
Then goes into ice fishing.  (warm, uhuh)

There were castles that used to be dignitaries homes that
are now used for the government.  Beautiful buildings that
one man in particular did most of.  He was a local Fin
architect and he had great talent.  It was neat.  We went
to the elite, high priced area of town.  This would be our
5th ave so to speak.  I'm looking, searching, almost standing
up before I realize, the shabby buildings in front of me are
what the woman is talking about.  Are you kidding?  No she wasn't.

On this trip there was a woman that sat next to me from Peru.
July and her husband were there touring Europe.  It started
off that he had work but then they took an extended week to tour.
She was awesome to talk to and would you believe she was
more outgoing than I was?  She was telling me of an island
that they have where she lives that moves.  It floats on
the water and people build and live on it.  Now that I have to see!

They also have this raccoon that is larger than many of our
dogs.  I'm standing next to this thing and the fur from tip
to tail was taller than me and even folded on the floor.
Okay, if I see one of these things on my garbage cans, I'm
moving!  The guys all laugh at me.  D and I got a laugh cause
there were these squirrels outside the Fur center.  This is your
species' cemetary and you go strutting around here?  Funny!

Yes, there was a wierd plug in for the hair dryer.
Funny money.  Strange language I'll never understand
(and I watched the captions on the tv trying).  But I
loved it all and I would come back at any time given.
Regardless, I now have more than one stamp in my passport,
have tried foods I've never tried before (I recommend the
reindeer, yum!) been drunk on caffeine, and have my silver
spoons from both Finland and Sweden.  Next stop, I hope is Copenhagen, Denmark.

Keep your fingers crossed!

For the Women - Men read with Caution

Now Men, I'm telling you up front that this has to do with women and their reproductive area. So if this is something you don't care to read, (and if I know you, you probably don't) I've given you fair warning up front. However, if your woman is acting strange and mentioning she doesn't know what is wrong with her body, you may just want to read this for information. Ye been warned - scalliwags!!

I have to honest and say that posting this isn't easy for me. For those who know me, it's not hard to figure out that I will discuss about any topic with anyone. I like to share knowledge that I've gained because learning is a hobby for me. It drives me. But this comes to the person side of me and to spill this is a little difficult.

Lately, I've noticed several changes in myself. For those who are at least 10 years older than me, you probably have already gone through this and are nodding and smiling at yourself that someone of the next generation is experiencing the same thing.

For me, it's been a little difficult to accept that I'm getting older, putting on weight, spreading in areas I don't want to spread. The hardest part has been accepting that I'm getting older, I'm no longer invincible (never was, but always felt I was) and grasping the obvious fact that there are no guarantees in life. Knowing that death means my children will grow up without me, and worse of all, have to live with their biological father, and there's nothing I can do to stop it.

No, there is no terminal illness on my end. Just grasping the changes that have come with getting older. Emotional changes are the hardest on a woman. Feeling more vulnerable to chance. Being irritated and not knowing why. Bouts of depression. I've never been one to be a drag and have usually been able to look at why I feel depressed, (lack of sleep, hormonal times, family issues) but of the last year it's been much harder to control.

The physical changes have been that my skin breaks out at anything, I hurt in the morning, everything I breath goes to my waist line and stays there, tired more often, and that overwhelming-uncontrollable craving for carbs, sugar, sweets and food in general. The top worse (men, I warned you) is that my period are OFF! WAY OFF!! They either last for 7 - 10 days or they just gush. It's horrid. It's getting to the point I'm afraid to go out in when I start. Who knows when I'm gonna go all over the place.

So I call my Mom cause she's a nurse. I didn't like what she said. Mainly cause I didn't want to face it and I've been one that if you don't want to accept it, you work through it and cure it. So being the computer geek I am, I did an internet search last night and I'm SO SO SO glad I did. Here's what I found out.

There's a little thing called perimenapause. It's pre-menapause. Basically, it's the change before the change. Now, we all know about premenstration. Menapause. Why has no one said anything about perimenapause? I feel wronged for lack of knowledge.

The best thing, I'm normal. Whew! It explained so many things. All the symptoms I was going through and several I wasn't. Best of all, it gave treatments. I don't like that word. Sounds like a word a Doctor uses to prescribe medicine. Something I'm not big on. God created a marvelous world and grows the cures for things naturally. There are 'treatments' to help the symptoms. Natural ones. Like eating better, getting more exercise. There are the pills, medicine and such.

Here's something I did learn that bothers me for some of my girlfriends. It says if you have followed the diet fads over the years, eaten low cal diets while you were younger (20's and such) and the Atkins Diet, South Beach Diet, you are only making worse on yourself. In fact, if you have followed these over the years, you have made your body insulin tolerant. That means that your body doesn't recognize the insulin coming into your body naturally and thus is puts a hard craving on sugars, carb and such - even more than the normal cravings that come with the symptoms. This isn't good ladies.

I'm putting in the links for those of you who want to do further study. Regardless, because we live in a drive up nation, I'm copying the symptoms for those of us who are lazy. I do so hope this helps those of you who are in my boat or soon to follow. I just wish someone would have told me and made my life much easier.

Symptoms of Perimenapause

• Menstrual irregularities. The intervals may be longer or shorter, your flow may be scanty to profuse, and you may skip some periods. As ovulation becomes more erratic, the absence of progesterone may lead to longer and heavier periods.
• Hot flashes and sleep problems. About 75 percent to 85 percent of women experience hot flashes during perimenopause. Intensity, duration and frequency vary. Sleep problems are often due to hot flashes or night sweats.
• Mood changes. Hormonal fluctuations may be responsible for the mood swings, depression and irritability you may experience during perimenopause. But these symptoms may also be caused by or aggravated by other symptoms you're experiencing, such as lack of sleep from nighttime hot flashes.
• Vaginal and bladder problems. When estrogen diminishes, your vaginal tissues may lose lubrication and elasticity, making intercourse uncomfortable or painful. Low estrogen levels may also leave you more vulnerable to urinary infections. Loss of tissue tone may contribute to urinary incontinence.
• Decreasing fertility. As ovulation becomes less regular, your ability to conceive decreases. However, as long as you're having periods, pregnancy remains a possibility. If that's not what you want, use birth control until you've had no periods for 12 months.
• Loss of libido. During perimenopause, sexual desire and arousal may gradually decline. The cause may be hormonal, but it can also result from other stresses in your life or your attitude toward aging.
• Body and skin changes. As your estrogen levels decline, your muscle mass decreases, body fat increases, and your waist and abdomen thicken. Lower estrogen levels also affect collagen in your skin, so it gradually becomes thinner and less elastic.
• Loss of bone. As your estrogen levels decline, you may lose bone more quickly than you replace it, increasing your risk of osteoporosis.
• Changing cholesterol levels. Declining estrogen levels may lead to unfavorable changes in your blood cholesterol levels, including an increase in low-density lipoprotein (LDL) cholesterol — the "bad" cholesterol — which contributes to an increased risk of heart disease.

link to info concerning perimenapause

http://www.womentowomen.com/LIBperimenopausearticle.asp

symptoms of perimenapause
http://www.mayoclinic.com/invoke.cfm?objectid=AD5A5A12-B388-40F4-B8073113B0A8BF4E&dsection=1

http://www.families-first.com/hotflash/news/symptoms.htm

treatments for symptoms of perimenapause

http://womenshealth.about.com/cs/menopause/l/bltreatperimeno.htm

For the men who have endured this, you are braver than most. Hope this helps your lady. For the girlfriends of mine, I got your back. For my family who has daughters, daughters in laws, hope this explains some things. For those who read this and it did nothing, well, I appreciate your time. :)

So good to know I'm normal.

Fishing with children IS labor......but enjoyable!

So .... since I work at this great place with 216 acres, 5 stocked ponds, 2 caves and full reign from the owner to have as much fun with my family as possible, who am I to say we shouldn't?

Labor Day, we pack up the kids, poles, lunch and such and head out to work. Hahaha, that sounds funny, but I enjoy where I work and I do find it relaxing more than often. How could I not? I was informed Friday to leave early and enjoy my weekend. There's no stress here, (okay, except when the code doesn't do as it should, the vault locks up, the Virtual Machine goofs on me and such, but that's just computers)

Last year I had purchased some fishing poles from one of the dealers at the South Eastern convention. They were cheap and all I could think of was the kids with one in hand learning to fish. How often do kids tear things up? Exactly! So why not have them learn on something cheap? Think I'll be the one buying my kids a brand new car when they're 16? They can drive the flat bed. B-bug had already decided when it's her turn she's painting it pink with purple flowers on it. Nothing fails to be an adventure with her. (makes me proud)

I actually took a picture of Bubs with the fishing pole in his hand, right before the batteries died on the camera. So I didn't get the 5 fish Dink caught, the 3 B-Bug caught or Doog-Boogs exasperated look at catching nothing. Even D got in some fishing. He took it on himself to teach Dink and B-Bug how to cast.....all day long. I offered, but he told me to go have fun. So I toted Bubs over with me and we joined my oldest on the other side of the pond.

Here's the three of us. Bubs on my lap clicking the release, then the lock, release, lock, release....you get the picture. I'm trying to hold my line so he can't reel it in when the bobber sinks. Ever try to wip a pole around with a 2 yr old hanging off the end of it? Interesting......

Bubs! We caught a fish!!! I reel it in while he's crying because I had to sit him down. That ended shortly after this fish about slapped him in the face. So I pick him up and we tote this fish back over to my husband to find out that we forgot a very important tool in fishing. The pliers. So he, with VERY LOUD PROTESTING AND NON AGREEMENT, violently has to remove this hook.

I realize people have this opinion that trappers have no respect nor consideration for animals but that's not the case, and were you to know D, you would find out that one way the kids are for sure to get into trouble is to harm an animal out of cruelty. Not cool.


So this one we don't throw back, it goes in the bucket. Bubs is thrilled. Everytime it flips in the water he yells in excitement. Pick him up, back to our side of the pond with Boog, now determined she's catching one also. Throw in the line. Bubs is now paying more attention to the line than the cookie in his pocket, to which he added his own worm.

Everytime I'd pull in my line he'd yell, "Yeah!" Thinking we had a fish. It was so cute!!! After the second fish we caught, we joined the other girls and dad on thier side. He was doing so good. I couldn't believe how much patience he had. Here's little Dink trying with all her heart to cast this line out and he was patient, gave her tips and let her do it on her own. She was doing a fine job and catching fish herself. God love her!!

Then B-Bug (who is ill today), she's gonna try to catch some too. Here's the two of them casting over each others' lines. Hahahaha! It was so funny! And D was so patient. Let me point out also, D's allergies are kicking his tale pipe. So he wasn't feeling so hot when we left the house even. I kept asking him to let me take over and he have some fun also, nope. I was to have fun. Awwwwww..............

Later on, he told me thank you for letting us fish at my work, cause he had fun and caught some too. Good. Now that made me feel better.

So Boog grabs a chair, plops her line in the water and just sits. I look over and theres her worm sitting on a bit of leaves and her bobber all sideways. She's not intentionally fishing, she's just being. Alright. I understand that. She's getting to be more bossy lately and the little Henny Penny is growing to that scary part of life that all Mothers have to face. Puberty. I'm very proud of her. More and more each day. I will call her name down the hallway, ready request a chore of her, only to find out she's already done it without asking. She instructs her sisters when they don't do things correctly. Okay, I'll be honest, she's bossy to her sisters, but she's trying. And she's so beautiful. I'm watching her in church the other day. Those almond shaped eyes under those long eyelashes. Long hair. And she's already taller than me. I know, I measured her last night.

I have the best kids in the world and I'll be the first to tell you. Now, let's all pray they stay that way.

Sitting on Top of the World

(The above picture was taken from Mt. Everest. As beautiful as it is, looks a little lonely doesn't it? I think I'd rather be part of the world rather than on top of it. Though I have to be honest and admit that God has allowed me to experience the exhilaration of being on top of the world many times in my life.)

So I'm back now for the Nation Trappers Convention. The kids and I took our time getting up there due to I had to work and they had their first week of school. My poor daughter, Doog-boog was so excited about going to junior high and it's not all she thought it would be. I think it was a bit overwhelming. I think she'll be able to hang though.

Silly thing. We've managed to some how bring home with us a nest of silk worms. Or inch worms one. Ever since I went to Sam's Club, we've been 'delighted' with our new guests. The girls get up each morning, pull them off the ceiling, throw them out the back door and repeat this when they get home from school. What's up with this? Are they paying me rent?

Back to the Trappers Convention. We all had a blast. Okay, D didn't, but we did. I even won a new gun. Let's see if I can get this right. It's a Remington 22 gauge. That's all I know. Oh, and that it won't bruise my arm up when I shoot it like the 12 gauge does. Lol. So now all I have to do is pull D away from his work come hunting season and see how bad my aim is during Turkey, Deer, Squirrel and Duck season. Here's hoping

The two bottles of wine I was promised from Trapper Paul I actually recieved. He had forgotten but he made good on it. Good being the optimum word. Let me tell you, this fellow makes the BEST strawberry, blueberry, raspberry wine of anyone I've tasted. There was also a champagne and I've tried his brandy. Yum, yum, yum. I haven't been able to open my bottles because I had a touch of something when I left for convention that just developed and grew. I brought it home with me so I feel a good bit under the weather. I'm sure the midnight swimming didn't help much.

Bubs ran the place like he owned it. At one point he was throwing a fit and I was taking him to a place for an attitude adjustment when one of the trappers offers him a piece of Dove's dark chocolate. He had that smeared all over the place. The joke around the other dealers was that he was testing the lure. There were many pictures taken of him.

He also made friends with a fellow named Jeff. Jeff is an Alabama trapper who is also a computer geek. For those who think I know my stuff, Jeff makes me look like a kindergartner. We were talking our geek speek and some had to leave shaking her head. Lol. Bubs made fast friends with him and I'm so glad he likes kids cause otherwise Bubs would have worn him out.

Well, I'm tired and I need to try to clear my head for more thinking. This is all for now.

How Lucky Am I?

My Mom is up for a couple of days. We've come a long way my Mom and I. There was a time when I didn't want to be around her, hear from her, let alone have her in my house. Now I find I wish my Mom lived walking distance from my house. I wish she was closer than a phone call and available for shopping/lunch/talks whatever on a regular basis. Funny how life is.

I have often been asked after the childhood that I had how I am the person I am and how it is that I even speak to my Dad. I don't have a solid answer for the first. I am the person I am based on the choices and mind-set that I have. I choose to enjoy life. I refuse to blame my failures on my parents. The mistakes I make as an adult are no one else's fault but my own. Those who believe otherwise live in a cop-out world and are week in person.

I chose to forgive my Dad but the strongest thing he did was to apologize to me. He came to me, in person, and apologized for the way I had been raised. I didn't bring it up to him and we weren't even discussing the subject. It kind up came up out of thin air. Even though I had forgiven him, there was still a great release inside me. I say this to remind us that sometimes the wrong we do other people not only deserves the apology, but is often needed to complete healing and allow both people closure.

Yesterday my precious girls started school. Can Doog-Boog truly be in 6th grade already? Wowo how time flies! Just yesterday she was two and so excited over a dress I had made her. Now she's taller than me (thank you God) and much more calm in person than I would have expected (remember she was two yesterday). She's such a joy. I'm so proud she's my daughter. Motherhood is nothing like I thought it would be. Which is a good thing. My kids are like my friends till they need to be corrected. Then I feel like the guard at the penetentiary.

Doog-Boog was so excited about her first day but come to find out when she got home it wasn't all it cracked up to be. Her best friend is now being home-schooled (there's a woman made of steel. She's got 4 of her own), another friend moved and I think the pressures of having to get from one room to another in a particular amount of time was a little stressful. I would guess she will have a better handle on things by the end of the week.

She was stretched out in the reclyiner doing homework after school and I thought, with excitement, 'that's my kid!' All beautiful with flowing hair. She has her Nana's (my mom) face, HA! And coloring! (for those of you who aren't family reading this, my mom is a natural red head) Mother Nature is becoming more insistant on making her a woman so she's starting to get a bit of shape to her. The timing on this Mother Nature and I don't agree much on. I think she should take shape, oh, around 16 or so. Not 11!

And she's quiet the helper. Last week while I was at work she was doing not just her chores, but she did a few extras that were never mentioned. Just to help, she says. Wow, what a help it was too. It's really hard to correct her or get on her for something she forgets to do when she does extra with no outside incentive. What a .......what do I put here? I can't very well call her a child? She's not a woman yet.......what a gal!

B-Bug took to her first day of school as well. She's all got her outfit laid out. Skirt, lacy shirt, .... and flip flops. Hahaha! That's my girl! She came home knowing all the new kids' names in her class. Everyone got a new haircut last week, (God was good when He guided my hands, now if He had only done the same for my own hair) so she's got this blonde hair with body in it, sparkling sky-blue eyes and perky personality heading off to conquor the 4rth grade.

Of everyone, she tans the best so you know she's got that from swimming the day before. B-Bug is at the stage where she wants to shower every day. Whew! Cause it was a fight with her sister at that age. Being the premadonna she is, she can't stink!! Heaven's no! She's wanting me to let her shave her legs, put on makeup, perm her hair. Now common a bit! There's NOOOOOO way I'm allowing one so young to do that yet. 'But Mom, all the other cheerleaders are." So if everyone is allowed to get pg, should I let you? - no, not a good analogy. I come up with this brillant retort, "I'm not every other cheerleaders Mother either." Yeah, I bombed.

Dink. Ah the precious Dink. Dink goes off the diving board for the first time and does a 1 1/2 flip. No kidding. Her first plunge from the board was a 1 1/2 flip. I was so proud. I was amazed. I was embarrassed that I don't have the same courage any longer. (the higher the weight, the harder you smack that water) She's the skinny minny of the group so when we are buying clothes she's still in a size 5 (sometimes 4) and she loves it.

Dink loves to be around me and it's so adorable when you whisper in her ear she's so "perrty"
cause her eyes light up and she starts to glow. As smart as she is, she's so shy. Not to be mistaken as a doormat mind you, cuase she has no trouble telling the truth to the little at school who thinks she's something cause she's a spoiled brat. And she likes to pick on my child. Makes me wanna go to school and kick her tail pipe.

Dink is the one with waters that run deep. I'm excited to see what she will choose as her path in life. Doog Boog mentions she wants to be a Dr. B-Bug wants to be an Actress/Model, and Dink wants to work at Walmart. Hahahaha! She also wants to be a Dr. Doog-Boog said last night she wants to go to Harvard. That won't be difficult for her if she learns how to study. She's got the mind for it - no doubt about it. (note to self: call investor)

And Bubs. Bubs has learned to count to three and jump off things. No matter that there's nothing other than the floor to land face first on, he leaps. He will now take you by the hand and chatter away while he drags you down the hall way, shoves you to the floor, opens the freezer door to take out an icecube, beat the remaining ingredients with his ball bat and then quickly close it at Mom's high pitched yell.

He gets so excited when I come home. How much more precious can he be when his face lights up at the very sight of me. He squeals and then grabs me tightly. Awwwwwwww........... Yesterday I was driving him to find he and Nana walking down the road. She puts him to the window and he's chanting "Mama, Mama, Mama" while he climbs through the window. He sqeezes my neck, lays his head on my shoulder, then turns around, takes control of the wheels and waves 'bye' to Nana. What a card. He knows he rules his world.


D is at convention now in Goshen. I miss him terribly. He called me at work yesterday. How does the sound of one's voice make my heart leap in such a manner? My whole day was perfect after that.

He tells me he was in meetings all day (and will be all week- such is convention) so he didn't have time for lunch. When I'm there for the week, I steal him away from everyone long enough to get something to eat and then he goes back to the grind stone. Poor baby.

It's times like these I'm glad Mom and the girls are there because then I have something to distract me from the 'blah' that I go into when he's not home. Regardless, I'm leaving here Thursday eve to join him. The girls were upset that they couldn't be there all week, but they weren't willing to give up the first week of school either. Who can blame them?

The neat thing is that when he calls there's always someone there taking the phone away, demanding to know why I'm not there yet. Hahaha, and the practical jokes i'm missing out on! Man! What a group of people. D said the attorney for the group was upset that he was leaving the day I was coming in. Awwwww...........I guess there was a table of 10 demanding the phone from him when he called me. Now that makes one feel loved.

Anyway, I'm off here and back to work. Love what I do, love seeing the birds on the feeder when I walk in and who can be upset at having thier own space, KLove blaring through the speakers?

O What a Beautiful Morning!!

Okay, today finishes up my second week at work. I love it!!!! I'm so thrilled. I have my own office with a window that is decorated with a hummingbird feeder. And since the building is on 150 acre farm with 5 ponds, there are many, many hummingbirds. In fact, every window has a feeder and they all get refilled every other day. Today, i swear I saw a hummingbird gargle. At least it tipped it's little head back and appeared to gargle. They are so beautiful.

The kitchen to this place is huge and filled with tables that face a wall full of windows, also alined with bird feeders. Not all for hummingbirds. This room looks out across the fields. It's lovely and relaxing. And stocked with all sorts of food. Schwans fills one freeze while icecream fills another. The fridge is stocked with drinks and has enough room for my lunch as well. Cabinets stocked with dishes and a LARGE assortment of tea, which just thrills me.

In the middle of the building is a large goldfish pond, stocked of course and right next to the workout room. Since I've gained some weight, mainly in the hips, thighs and dreadfully in the waistline, I'm working back into my clothes. This weight gain I will attribute to having to sit on the couch and code 8 hours day for the past sememster. (not to the fact I wouldn't exercise, ate junk food and just became a couch potato)

So let's get back to my office. I have KLove pouring out of the speakers on the computer, (when I'm not learning more about .Net coding from the videos), a book shelf (that needs many more books on .Net of course), and a file cabinet (with the plant I've chosen to kill this month.) I need some photos of my family and I have in the plans to go to Wally World and find some frames. Also, my hubby went out to NM and said he has coming some prints of wild life. Those I will enjoy.

I even have my own extention! Hehehehe! You have no idea what I went through just to put a message on my system. Now how silly can you imagine I was. No, it was worse. I typed out the message before I recorded it. And still goofed it up!

Now the kids. They didn't want to go to thier dads and after the things they told me, I don't blame them. I didn't want them to go either. I miss them so much. They have been gone all week. I have to honest, I'm very worried. They went down to Florida and I'm so fearful they won't make it back. This just has to be Mother's anxiety. Everything inside me wants to drive down there and pick them up so I know they make it back safely. (like there would be a difference in the 'mario andrette driving I do next to his grey-haired driving, riiiight)

Apparently, as with most divorces, I'm the evil one again. Well, at least I'm consistent. I don't feel they need to be subjected to his antics and opinions in this manner, but who am I to stop it. So far mine and D's attempts are frutile. Kinda like his attempt to be a man. (ooops, did I really say that?) Before I rant and rave about everything he says and make this unenjoyable, lemme just leave it at this. He calls to say he's "moving slow" that Sunday and is it okay to pick the girls up late. Hmmmm, (keep in mind, I'm the bad parent) I have to be in Indy to pick up D from the airport and we have reservations at a resturaunt. This info I kept to myself.

Nope, you need to be here by this time (15 after the agreed time) or you will have to pick them up tomorrow. "I can't drive there twice! What's the deal? Are you alone?" You can be here by that time or pick them up tomorrow. Everybody paying attention? I kid you not, this is what he said, "Can't you just leave them there?"

He wants me to leave my children at a school, not knowing if he has car trouble, wrecks, some freak is there. And I lose my ever loving mind. WHAT! Are you.....what....ARE YOU ON CRACK!?! "it's not like I'm not on my way." no. NO. NO!!! You'll either be there or you'll wait. You decide. I'm not leaving my children there alone. Are you crazy!?!

No. I didn't leave my children there and he made it on time. May I point out, my youngest one was begging me the whole time that if he said she could stay could she stay. Of course the answer to that question has always been yes, but we all know he won't agree to that. She still tries every time. And as the comic says, "and it goes through my mind....."

Okay, so my kids are in Florida, hopefully having a good time and not getting eaten by the sharks, my boy. Oh my boy. The cremudgian. He has:
* Opened the pantry, climbed it like a monkey, pulled out the marshmellows while I stood and watched in awe. (must keep insurance on the boy and find a good Dr.)

*Climbed the piano. (we don't have a bench. how is this possible?)

*Found now four different ways to turn my computer off while I'm using it. The last one was to stand on the plug that is sticking out of the wall. (if he lives, it will be an act of Congress)

*The tomato. Here's a story. He managed to stretch a tomato across two rooms. It was all down the front door, the window in the door, the window next to the door, the floor in front of the door, the rug on the floor, himself, the carpet between the dining and living room, the rug in front of the back door, the two sliding glass doors, his high chair and one dining room chair.

*Discovered that he can write with his toes if he puts the marker in them.

*Climbed up on the rabbit cage. This was interesting being that it comes up to my shoulders. But it was fun to watch.

And tell me please how it is that he can be up for 5 min and in that time frame totally destroy a perfectly cleaned house?

Fat and Tanned!!

Wow I am so far behind on this!!!

1rst. Since I was called from FL and chewed out for not letting anyone know, yes I got the job!!!! I am so excited and I start this Monday. My plan is to go in early, say 9, and use the exercise room some. I have to shamefully admit that my middle is now so big that I am not fitting in my clothes. On vacation, I discovered that my favorite jeans have a rip at the pocket. Not the good rip that shows jeans are loved and well worn, but the kind that says, "OH MY GOSH! YOUR BUTT IS WAAAAAY TO BIG TO BE SHOVING IN ME!!!!" and the pants gave. Not good when you have bright pink undies on. I had nothing else to wear, so I wore my HUSBANDS shirt.

So I will go in, use the tread mill, organize my office with a window, steal furniture from other offices. (is it stealing if you are given permission?) and look at what else it needs. (ie, pics of family, fishing pole behind door for lunch, white board for planning programs, book shelf for books on VB.Net.) I can't wait and I'm so excited. Even the babysitter called all excited. YEAH FOR ME!!! (not for my butt)

2nd. We all just went on vacation. Everyone had about a week except Dad. He got a very mere three days. It wasn't long enough and would you believe that the office was trying to call him on his first day? Are they crazy? Like he gets much time away to just play? Soooooo..........I confiscated the phone and shut it off. They can wait.

What did we do? Well, we went to Maryland where we did some chicken-neckin. That was cool. You tie pieces of chicken to string with weights, throw it over a bridge and just go down the line of strings. One person pulls up the string while the other person takes a net and catches the crabs. (the good kind) Note: Kids aren't good at catching, better at knocking off of the line.
Regardless, B-Bug only knocked off two really good sized ones. She caught all the ones we couldn't eat and had to let go. (we'll catch those next year)

We went to Maryland convention first and that's where I learned something new. Okay, much new. I learned that bee pollen is good for stamina. And allergies. I learned that one friend of mine must keep half a pack of red man in his cheeks cause when he spit it out, that was the only dimple he had. Funny! And how to make Woompum Juice. Oh now people. This stuff is great. You don't taste the whiskey and you don't get hangovers. And if you aren't careful, yes, it is reputed to "woomp" you. I had mine with some moonshine. Learned a bit about that too! There's clear and not clear. I had some clear. Will find out how to get my hands on some "not" clear. Regardless, there are some talented people out there with some interesting stories, that's for sure!

Then, after the convention and the chicken neckin', we went out on a boat to go fishing. Now let me tell you something. These people had this house on the bay. Wow, oh wow! You know, you read about mansions all the time in books, you dream about them, you even see them on television and the movies. I have never seen one like this in real life. I drooled.

Okay, on the bottom floor, side next to the bay, ALL WINDOWS!!! There was a library made of mahogany that was scrumpious with a fireplace that was salvaged from a house in France built in the 1800's. I stood there with my head tilted back, (drool down the chin) and just gasped in awe. There was an inground pool with a gazebo that had heat and air. A huge round pic nic table in the center. Huge gardens all around the place, tennis courts, beamer in the garage, but the house. You just had to see it to believe it. The fellow that took us out on the boat built the house. I was amazed. Impressed. I told him so.

You have to see him too. Morgan. Makes me think of Tombstone. Handlebar mustache, thick hair. And wouldn't you know it. His girlfriend does the gardens. They both were at the convention. Heres your kicker, they both trap. You just had to be there.

So here's all of us on the boat. All 11 of us. Cause there's my family, our host for the weekend, his wife, his son, his nephew and our captian. We are flying out across the water. Bubs is watching and wanting to climb into the water because now he thinks he can walk on water. (bubs is not short for Jesus)

We stop and get out some lines. I climb to the front of the boat because though it's my husbands vacation, he has decided I get to fish first while he watches the wild cremudgian boy. I caught two!! Here's these big, beautiful fish with shiny purple heads "croaking" at me. (probably saying, 'put me BACK, put me BACK, mom was right, I should never have swam up the river.) Bubs was enthralled. He kept saying, "see it? see it?" He would stand back with his eyebrows up high, mouth open wide and go, "AH!!" It was so funny! Like I said, you just had to be there.

Each one of the girls got to reel a fish in and it was so cute cause B-Bug and the nephew kept pulling in there lines to see if they had any bait left. They were all talking about how a shark ate their bait and here's Doog Boog teasing this young fellow, (young, he's 2 years older) "Oh yeah, did you see that big shark take off my bait? I bet he's as long as the boat. I'm afraid he'll eat my arm off." I'm up there peering over the side at here. She's smiling as she watches this red headed little guy wearily peek over the edge of the boat. Something splashed the water, (probably her with her pole) and she jumps and yells. "See! It's that shark!" That poor fellow believed her the whole time.

Dink kept the same bait the whole time, though she was a chicken neckin' fool. When Dad hooked one and let her reel it in, it took all the self control I had not to get invovled cause the thing was pulling my wee one over board just from the weight of it. She hung in there like a real trooper though, she wasn't gonna be beat from it and she giggled at it the whole time. The girl has some serious tan lines also. Where'd she get that from?

B-Bug is all the model on the boat trying to strike a pose against the poles while we're flying across that water. That's all I need, one bump and she'd be crab bait. Hmmmmm................there's an idea...........maybe we could string up some lines off her toes..........

Bubs, when it was my time, I thought I'd see just how brave he is. So, since he had already kicked off his shoes, we jumped the side of the boat to the very back end where there's this piece of wood there. He was standing on it. No, that's not enough. Splashed by the waves and all. NOooooooooo, my boy has to sit down. Okay, I have him by the hands. Nooooooo, now he wants to sit on the edge, then slide into the water, doesn't anyone feel the similarity to the fox and gingerbread man here?

The kid. I'm telling you. We took him to the pool at the hotel. The girls are diving for rocks. So he decides that every rock that the hotel is using for decoration should also be dove for. In they go, three at a time. You couldn't stop him. Then Dad and I taught him to count to three and he would throw him in. That became a funny story. Cause Chawman barely catched him as he stood on this truck hood saying, "tree tree tree" and jumped too him. We all got a laugh out of that one, before he wore us all out on it.

You know, it never fails to amaze me. Dad and I are scaling the fish and he leaves me. Okay. No big deal. He returns with all three girls, rags and knives in hand, for a lesson in cleaning fish. I forget sometimes about life lessons that need to be taught from one generation to the next. See, I was 8 when I learned to clean fish. Not only did he teach them, but I have to be honest and say I was learning a bit also. I still laugh when I think of what it had to be to anyone looking out on that deck. Here's four girls and a man out there, scales all flying in the air, landing in the hair, on each other, fish guts on the table, little Dink is all kicking butt on that scaling too! Fish all flopping around in the table as the girls are trying to get a handle on them. It was hilarious!

We ate till we were miserable. We had hard shell crabs by the bushel the first night. The whole family was out there on that picnic table with butter knives cracking and eating. Bubs kept everyone busy peeling crab. There ain't a one of those girls that can't get to crab meat with a serious vengence.

Who here has had soft shell crab? Oh the glorious things that God comes up with. Soft shell. That's when the crab has shed it's shell and every last bit of it is meat. You clean them, dip them in flour, and fry them up. They look like tarantulas. They're great! We pigged out on those, fish, fried green tomatoes from my own garden, and a delicious fruit cocktail cake. YUM!! Company wasn't bad either!

The third day we went to some of the islands that Dad has read about. Oh, talk about beautiful! You aren't going to belive this, but Davy Crockette took our picture. I kid you not! I even saw his drivers liscence. David Crockette. That night we had linguini with clam sauce. OH yum yum yum!

The next morning we get up early and get lost taking Dad to the airport. I'm sobbing and trying to hide the fact I'm crying. He had to fly out to NM while the kids and I come home. It wasn't fear from having to drive it was just the fact that he was leaving me with all this crap going on around the world. And he was going to be away from me.

So, we get him there. I cry. He gets on a plane. I get in the car. I get lost in DC. Who's surprised? Take a wrong turn off 495 to 95 S and we took the short cut to 70W. You know, it was kinda fun. I felt like I could have driven all the way home but Dad had mentioned for me to stay at this hotel that we stopped at on the way in. I know it was cause he was worried about me. He wanted me to take his cell phone but how am I to call him if I have that and he doesn't? I'm glad we stayed. We all went swimming, Bubs did his rock thing, tried to walk on water, Doog Boog beaned me in the head with a rock. It was a blast! We goofed off when we got in and I got a much yearned for phone call from Dad at 3:40 am. He made it there safely. Thank you God!

It was fun. I loved it. I look forward to doing it again next year. However, who all agrees that three days is NOT long enough of a vacation for the man? Thoughts are pondering and brewing as I type. Anyone wanna offer up some ideas? Babysit for the cremudgian?

My Precious Girls

It has been brought to my attention that I don't tell much about my girls in my blog. Well SHAME ON ME!! My sweet girls who make me so very proud. Who love me when I feel like no one else does. Who lift my spirits without knowing I'm down. Those precious children that beg me to join them on the trampoline and then giggle as they ask me five minutes later if I've wet myself yet. (try jumping on one for a while and tell me you don't)

Let me be the first to tell everyone that I have the most wonderful girls in the all the world. They are all smart, funny, and they are proof that no matter how many children a woman has, they all have different personalities. I'll use thier nick names.

Let's start with Doog Boog. (she hates when I call her that) Boog is now 11. She's looking at "crossing over" and rolls her eyes when I mention what she needs to be aware of. Boog isn't boy crazy (THANK GOD!) She's coming into her own though. She used to be goofy and this past year decided she wasn't going to do that any more. Now she can't understand why the boys are all asking her out. Well, let's see. She's got beautiful sky-blue eyes, long hair and she's the smartest kid in her class. She's not one to go with the grain. She stands her ground without being mean or smart aleck. She'll tell you how she sees it. She also can have her heart broke clean in two if she finds out she's disappointed her Dad and I. She knows she smart and helps others out when they need it. The teachers have told me more than once that they use her as a tutor for the other students. I'm so proud. What Mom wouldn't be?

Boog used to be a cheerleader but this year she wants to go into basketball and play the flute. My girl is already as tall as me. I figured she'd be that tall at 13, but she got a head of schedule. She likes to pat me on the head and tell me it will be alright. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She usually does things she thinks will help out and loves to take care of her brother. She's been after me to let her babysit. God love her. She takes after my mother with the porcelain skin and freckles that go with it. She got out of the red hair but she doesn't tan any better for it. Lol!

She was so excited about church camp last week that she told Dad and I "I'm so excited I can't think right." hahahahaha! When we picked her up I told him, "you know, she's really turning into a beautiful young lady" and he agreed. (Need to be shining that shot gun up.)
She's just as excited about 6th grade also. She loves God and gets on me many, many times for things I say or do. She is the ringleader at taking her sisters to church when she goes to her other dad's. SHE is the one that gets everyone up and they ride thier bikes all the way to church since he doesnt' get up till 1 in the afternoon. (no, he doesn't work second either)

Now B-Bug. She's 9 and we usually refer to her as our Drama Queen. She loves it. She loves attention. B-Bug has goals to be everything under the sun before she's dead. I hope she does it. She's got the ponash and the personality to do it all. She's smart also and tends to be the most popular kid in the class. When she had her birthday party, all the girls showed up and there were kids from other classes begging her to talk me into letting them come. (I can only afford so much)

She is blonde, blue eyes that are almost white. She is most usually wearing a smile and she makes everyone fall in love with her at the moment they meet her. B-Bug has they perky personality and lights up every room she walks in. Oh, and she loves to shop. (she did NOT get that from me!) This year she made cheerleader and I think she would have been heart broken had she not.

Recently B-Bug is starting to get a bit of a mouth and argues with her sisters on everything. This I attribute to age and that she's following in her sisters footsteps going into that "crossing over" stage. I figure she and I will have more arguements and butt heads more than her sisters and I will. She's been proving me right on this already this past week. I just hope she doesn't get to that stage where she hates me and does things that hurt herself in the end to get back at me.

If you saw her, you'd know why she's very popular with the boys as well as the girls. She's rarely with out a "boyfriend" as they call it. (they change boyfriends in her class like they change underwear, every two - three days. I'm alright with this and would like for it to stay that way till after college) Where Boog was agast when she got a HUGE candy heart for Valentines day (and to brag a bit more, she tried to refuse it and give it back. the boy wouldn't take it.) B-Bug takes it with grace and glows afterwards. Anyone want to guess what her love language is? I have to admit, the boys have me very, very frightened. I'm thinking of enrolling all my girls in tae kwon do. Anyone wanna chip in on the cost? I can send you an address.

Now Dink. Awwww, my precious Dink. I thought she was my last child. She was my only fat baby. Coming out a full pound and half heavier than her three siblings. Dink made almost 100's in all her class subjects. I think it was 98, 99, 99, 100 and 97. Who's counting, right?

Dink is my only brown - eyed girl. She feels a little out of place on many different occasions. I think it's cause so many people 'talk over her'. She's learning though that she can tell them that they interrupted her. She's very mild mannered and quiet. Not to be mistaken as introverted.

Dink's favorite thing to do is jump on the trampoline. We got a new mat for her birthday and she's doing her best to break it in. She's also very mechanically inclined. Since before Kindergarten when she was right upon me while taking apart a hard drive, the girl knows the names and usage for most common tools. She's the first to jump in when Dad is doing anything. (he's a mechanic by trade, that's his fun job - not the one he does now) She's the one that will surprise us all, I'm sure.

Dink loves her Mama. Her little eyes sparkle when I talk to her. She loves to help me with anything. Cooking, laundry, dishes, sweeping. Tonight she helped me clean Dad and I's bathroom. And she's telling me while we are cleaning that she likes to clean with me. Awwwww. Makes my eyes water. She wants me to let her take care of her brother more but lands sakes, he's almost as long as she is!! She was the fattest baby but she is the skinniest of the girls. And I do mean skinny. If it weren't for lenth, she could wear the same pants she wore in Kindergarten. Literally.

I look at my girls and they all make me proud in different ways. I am constantly telling them I love them and that I'm proud of them. I know it's not that far around the corner that they won't listen to me anymore and I will be the old Mom that cramps thier style. I like how Doog Boog rolls her eyes and sighs each time she tells me she loves me and I tell her I hope she still does in 3 more years. She always tells me, "Of course I will Mom. I'll always love you." Okay, maybe she will, but B-Bug will be the one to tell me I'm fat and she hates me. Oh, ladies, enjoy those children while they are young and the only thing they step on is your toes. (in those awful shoes!!)

I have the best girls around. Period.

Making Forward Motion

Well, yesterday I went to a job interview. I haven't been to a job interview in a LONG, LONG time. I'm trying to think. I don't believe I had to go to a job interview to be a substitute so I would say it's been ...... wow, I truly can't remember.

So, I can't stop myself from being me, I have to ask those questions about the boss that are stirring my curiousity through the course of conversation. I even paused and mentioned this was probably not the time, but ........I asked any how. Come to find out later, it was a good thing I asked. Yeah for me!

Dad is in DC right now and so I have taken this opportunity to break Bubs from the binki cold turkey. You know, he's really not doing so bad. Maybe it wasn't the baby I needed to break from it as much as myself and everyone else. He's on day 4.

Took everyone to the pool today and would you believe Bubs was begging to go down the water slide. Sooo........went back up front and bought Mom a braclet for the pool and all his sisters are laughing and following us up the ladder to the top of the slide. It was so much fun. Then here's Doog Boog and I laying out at the baby pool, side by side during the break.

She just came to me to show me her tan line. WOAH! She's burned! She's laughing at me now. "I dont' feel burned." You will later, doll. Dink is combing out my hair and putting it in many different styles. That makes me feel loved. B-Bug went out to the trampoline to get more of a tan. Not fair, not fair. She and Dink tan the best of all of us. (I now have a ponytail sticking out of the side of my head and a young lady laughing at me.)

So, my tired self is taking a break. I've finished drywalling the door, packed ebay stuff, cleaned house, done laundry, and changed a very cranky baby. FYI, people, you can comment on here without having a blog of your own if you so choose.

My Boy Bubs

Okay, so the kid is only 19 months old. But how cute can one boy be? Yesterday, he's sleeping. He's SOOOO behind on his nap it's not funny. As soon as dad cranks the mower over, the kid is up and yelling, "out, out out!" He wants to go mow.

Now this is what dad has been waiting for. He was so patient for a couple hours for the boy to get a nap, cause let's face it, he likes having the boy on the mower as much as the boy likes being on the mower. So here's my two men out there with their floppy hats making laps around the yard. Every time they go by, Bubs waves. I'm sure he was yelling "hi" but of course that was only cause his mouth was open. (guess I should have grabbed that binki last round, cause now the coons will be the only ones able to find it.

Dad decides to give Mom a bit of fun with the boy so I'm now on the mower with the kid. Ahhh........it's MOM! Now he gets squirmy. How sweet is it when your boy lays his head on you. Awwwwwwwww.........he looks back and me and I plant a kiss on his forehead. He thinks this is funny and makes a game of it. Looks up, kiss. Look up, kiss.

Now he wants on my lap, wants to steer, pulls the choke down and almost kills the mower, runs it off the path, beeps the horn. (the horn doesn't beep by the way, but Bubs does) Then he's hanging off my arm over the edge. What the devil? I study him to discover that he's watching all the bugs, butterflies, grasshoppers as they run out of the way of the mower. He finds this hilarious.

Now, he's learned a new word, or is it two? Butt crack. And he knows where his is. There ain't a one of you out there that wouldn't laugh if you heard him say it while he pats his diaper. But what can I say. We were in the shower and he gives me a "surprise". "This?" he says innocently. YOW!

We took him to Holiday World where I discover one more time how unconveintional his dad and I are at parenting. We are in the wave pool. Each of us has an arm and we are allowing the boy to float in the waves, bobbing up and down. He's loving it. We're loving it. The woman next to me, whose body leads me to believe SHE ain't never had a kid, is GLARING at me. Hmmmm...........maybe she needs someone to hold her arms while the waves bob her up and down. Makes me wanna ask her, "do you need a hug?" Hehehehehehe.................

Then we take him to the kiddy playground where his dad and I are having a blast shooting people with water, dumping buckets on people, going down the slides with him and just being two overgrown kids ourselves. Now if we could have just taken him down the big people's water slides..........................

How Sweet are Friends?

Today one of my best friends came up with her children to stay the weekend. I am so delighted. I wondered, after 4 years, would we still be the same, friend-wise. That was very easily assured early on in the eve.

Our two oldest (both girls) are only a year apart and our two youngest (both boys) are merely 5 months apart. It was amuzing and entertaining to watch the boys play together. Her boy has long dark hair, is slightly chubby, and about an inch shorter than Bun. So here's my boy sitting on his back trying to get a horse-back ride, bringing his favorite toys to him and putting them in his hands, showing him around, sharing his favorite crackers and drinks with him, having an all around good time.

The difference between my friend and I are many. She lives in Louisville, I live in the country. The boondocks. It was funny, she thought there was something wrong with her phone because she couldn't get a signal. (hahaha, that's just plain normal around here!) So when Bubs is bubs and stands on the table, she gets anxious. I instruct him firmly to get down. It took her a while to walk out of the room and rest that her boy would come to no harm, my older girls where watching him. It was good for her to relax a bit, she's pg again. (theres a story for another day!)

This gal has done so much for me. She is directly responsible for my current existence. Jenn and I met in college. We were instantly arch enemies. The next year we were housed right across the hallway from each other, at the end of the hall where there is no door out. We had to go the full length of the dorm to the stairwell out. NOT GOOD! So, we made friends. And after getting to know each other, we made best friends. You didn't see one without the other.

Many times in college I was depressed and heading to the car to drive it off into Persy Priest Lake. How it is that she always "popped up" before I got to the car had to be God and God alone. It got to where I planned it when she should be at work, class, on a date. Always she "popped up".

And the "popping up" was the least of it. She would lock her arm through mine and ask me where we were going. Truth be known, true suicides don't want an audience and don't tell. If someone is threatening, they are asking for help, not necessarily just attention. My answer would be 'for a drive.' Then it got to be, "I'm going for a drive, you are going.........(to work, to class, with so-in-so)" Nope, she would climb in, click her seatbelt and not leave.

Well now, I couldn't very well drown her with me. I mean, com'mon, that would be murder. And she was just too kind of a person. The world needed her a bit longer. (yes, realize that there is no sense in murder/suicide. All will send you to hell.)

Sooooo........we would drive around. She would chatter away. Make me laugh. We would stop somewhere to eat, I would play the deaf person and do sign language during the whole meal to mess with the servers, and we would laugh amongst ourselves about it later. (because of her, there was a 'later')

As stressful, aggravating, annoying, painful, disstressing, rotten and horrid as times in life can be, I would never have known what it was like to fall in love, to give birth, to mend a relationship with my mother, to see the parts of America I have experienced (NYC being my favorite at the time), get my degree, make more friends and enjoy all the blessings God has graciously advanced my way if it weren't for my friend. She would argue with me, but I owe her so much, and truthfully, she deserves it.

Aside from the noble acts she unknowingly did at the time, she is also very much like me in person. We are clutzy, stubborn, strong-willed, goof balls that bawl our heads off at chick flicks like 50 First Dates. We enjoy virtually all sweets. Worry about how well we raise our children. Are concerned about what kind of wives we are to our husbands. Can sit and talk for hours, lose track of time and spastically get off the phone leaving the other person cracking up on the other end.

There has never been a time in our friendship that I have regretted knowing Jenn. She is honest to me, even when it's not what I want to hear. (I have a few other golden friends like that, I am blessed) She has always concerned herself with me instead of herself. And the best part of all is that I'm not the only person she is like that with. That's just Jenn.

And as worried as she is about the baby she is carrying, I know that God is not merely going to take care of her, He's going to repay her for all the kind-hearted, loving things she does for people. She deserves what she wants in life and I wish her well.

SPRING HAS SPRUNG THANK YOU GOD!!!!!!!!!

After cleaning up the massive mess Bubs creates at least three times everyday, the two of us don on shoes and go for a walk. Ahhhhhh.........we have to shed the jackets. It's so warm.......marvelous! We are walking down the road, breeze gently caressing us, birds chirping, sun shining. I love it!! So does he!

We are walking past the neighbors dog, in the cage of course and he turns all the way around in the stoller with just one of those little buns on the very edge? How does he do that? If that were me, I'd already kissed the sidewalk. He watches the dog intently, and then, growls back at it. It was so adorable.

Further down the road we come across the next neighbors' horses. I love horses and they have about 7 of them all on land about the size of our back yard. Probably not very healthy. Beautiful animals. Now each morning Bun likes to crawl up in my bed, pull up the blind and look for the horses that are right out our back window. I thought he'd enjoy these majestic creatures standing within arms reach, right? WRONG!

I guess he deciced that they were far much larger than the ones he gazes at each morning and starts to, well, not cry. It was so funny. He's so much like his mother. He's frightened, curious. He can't turn away, he can't go full boar. He's, hiding his face in my neck one minute, reaching out to, no pull the hand back, reach out again. I took it and made him pet the horse. He giggle and hides his face in my neck again, peeking out from underneath. Reaches out again, waiting for me to take his hand. And mom says, "awwwwwww......"

So we finish going down the road to where the last house has, I kid you not, baby doll heads on the fence posts. What's that all about? The kids told me about it referring to the movies Toy Story and Chucky. It was fairly freaky, I have to admit. Hmmmmm.........well, okay........

Coming back, he has to do his balancing act while looking at the horse, growling at the dog, watching to waterfall. Get home and he's all through the flower bed. They'll grow back and he won't be this size forever. Through the yard to where there are about 2,000 flies on the side of the house. Again, what's that all about? It was so funny, he stands there staring at it. They make this eerie buzzing noise, the combination of them all. It frightens him. Hahahaha, he's pointing at the mass, talking in his nonsense language, and runs. Funny!

Besides all this, I have to let everyone know, I did something I never thought was possible. I turned in the VB.Net assignment due THIS Friday, at 1:30 am this morning. EARLY!! Yeah for me!!!!! Now, if the prof will ever post what is due for the final project, I'm sure I can work on that as well.

Goal for this week: Get database homework done. Ace my C++ test tomorrow. (It's a Larry test. Everyone who has taken Larry Strains 'anything' class, knows what horror I am about to face.) and see if I can't get ahead in ANY of these classes. Cross fingers, say prayer.

You've GOT to be kidding!!

Okay, so last we hear, I can't find my planner anywhere. So I talk to my spouse and he to me he doesn't have it. SWEARS it to me. We give up the search. The next morning I hear, "Oh yeah, I was pulling things out of the truck and found your planner there." The scarier thing was on the day he was coming back he tells me he HOPES he brought it. I inform him I will send him BACK to Bloomington, IL for it. He pulls over and checks, it's all good! (heart beat slows down)
This is the same man who has lost three phones in taxis, my new camera with Bub's first trip to NYC on it (also in taxi cab) and money only God knows where. Yes, I have reason to worry. And, he took the new camera on a trip to DC just today.

Sooo, after sending my hubby back to the airport the morning after he came home, and going to church, I decide I will conquer the trampoline. The youngest girl got a new pad for it for her birthday. So, all three of the girls and I go out the replace it. I have now strained my shoulders, ripped the skin off my hand, and have come to know just HOW out of shape I am. It was so worth it, the girls and the neighbor spent all day out there having a blast.